Just Another Blog?
I’m still not quite sure what I’m doing here with Existing for More. I mean, I know I’m “blogging”, but beyond that, what is my purpose? This idea came to me out of the blue one day while I was driving home. I know exactly where I was on my street when the thought struck me. The thought hit like a ton of bricks and as I parked in front of my house and turned my car off, I just sat there thinking, “Really? Seriously?” It is clear to me God spoke to my heart that day. I’m as unsure today as I was that day as to why He called to do this, but here we are.
Anything I do I either do 100% or zero. The word moderation is foreign to me. I’ve poured my heart into this site and my blogs the past few months trying to get ready for this self-imposed deadline. September 1. Tomorrow. How is it here already?
First Things First
When this idea first came to me, I approached my good friend Abby before even Seth. She’s done her fair share of blogging and the girl does her research. Part of me was hoping for a response like, “I mean you could, but are you sure?” Since she is one of the most supportive people in my life, I have no idea why I’d go to her if that’s what I wanted to hear. That was not her response at all. Instead her response was “You’d be great at this! I’d love to share what I’ve learned about it.”
Crap. So once I got sign-off from Seth on the idea, we were off to the races. We met regularly during the planning. She helped me reign in all my ideas and things I’ve read and guided me as I attempted to put some focus to it all. I honestly could not have done it without her.
Learning New Things
In my full-time job, I’m a project manager and the bulk of the projects I work on are developing WordPress websites. I’m no developer, but this wasn’t all brand new to me. I’ve been in plenty of dashboards, slowly have picked up some html, am familiar with making changes in a CMS, and even understand the importance of a responsive theme.
That background has been extremely helpful as I’ve maneuvered through the customization abilities of the theme I’ve chosen for my site. I even could ask coworkers some general WP questions that would help me continue on as I made this my own. And when all else failed, my relationship with Google grew.
What’s the Problem?
Sounds like I’ve done the footwork right? So then, why am I still so unsure about this whole thing? Well, I intend to share intimate stories, experiences, and feelings in this space. It’s not so much what I’m sharing though; I’ll share these stories anytime, when it’s the right time and someone might benefit from them. But usually I’m siting face-to-face (or maybe on the phone) with the person who is going to be reacting to my story. So yeah, this is a new world I’m stepping into.
As blogging has grown and become more and more a part of how we get information and it seems that everyone’s mom is doing it, I feel at ease and intimated at the same time. What if I do it wrong? What if someone already said this exact thing? All real concerns, but I know I need to just suck it up. Ultimately, I’d like to be able to do for someone else what many people (bloggers, friends, mentors, public speakers) have done for me and that’s simple share experience and encouragement. If that’s my goal, how can I do it “wrong”?
Driven By 100 Forms of Fear
Yet, this past week the fear has become real and almost overbearing at times. I suffer from the fear of what others think of me. I’m sure I’m not alone. No matter how much I tell myself it does not matter what others think, only what God thinks, I still fall victim of caring to much about the things of this world. As I shared my fears with my husband, the other night he told me about Mel Gibson. Apparently Mr. Gibson doesn’t read any reviews about himself. When asked why, his comment was “Because then I’d have to read the bad ones too.” Great point.
What I explained to Seth is that it’s not the negative feedback or bad reviews that I might hear that scares me the most… It’s what I’ll never hear. It’s the comments that don’t get left. What are people thinking? Is this worth it? Have I offended someone? Did I create tension? If I don’t hear the negative, how will I continue grow? How will I make this blog better?
Just Keep Going
At the end of the day, I am going to continue to follow where God is leading me. He’s brought me to this point, a point I never thought I’d be I might add… And He continues to prove He’s not leaving me. Top to that, I have some incredibly supportive friends who are cheering me on and supposedly lining up to read this. 😉 And a bonus, I’ve this got this amazing, handsome stud standing by my side, cooking dinners, folding laundry, and cleaning the kitchen so I can write. I better make it worth it!
Didn’t I just get done telling you I’m still not sure about this? I sound pretty un-confident don’t I? Then you’ll laugh when you hear me say I hope this blog gets so big I can quit my day job! Yeah, I dream big, and there’s no middle ground. The blog is either going to tank or be an overnight success in my mind… Oh brother. But who knows what God has in store for me and for us and Existing for More. But, I’ll making this a priority and write as much as I can, when I can, praying for what needs to be shared.
Part of my plan is to not do this alone. Early on in my planning I read about “guest bloggers” and I love that idea. There are so many amazing people in my life I’d like to pull in and let you hear from them too. So don’t be surprised to hear from a farmer (my husband), or a business owner. Maybe a mom or a figure competitor. Who knows?! I’ll keep you posted on those plans, but if that’s not incentive enough to follow me, I don’t know what is! 🙂
So What’s the Purpose?
So like I talk about on my About Me page, what I’m going for with this blog is wanting to create a space where women can connect with like-minded women who are longing for more from this life. What is this something more? Well, ultimately, for me, this means growing in my relationship with God. Understanding His word, spending time with Him, praising Him, loving His kids, pursuing Him in all things and continuing to become the woman He intended me to be.
Ok, that’s great, but what else right? I mean, we have jobs, we need to stay healthy, we need to take care of our homes. So what does this pursuit look like on a daily basis and how in the heck is this blog going to be supportive? Well, maybe it won’t be. But my hope is to encourage you all to keep Him in the center of your life by showing you how I try (and fail) to do that too. In turn, I hope to do a better job keeping myself on track. You know, not let my to do list rule me. Anyone else guilty of this?! Man.
What Will You Read About?
So this blog is about nutrition, fitness, spirituality, and marriage. And specifically, it’s about my journey in each of these areas. Again, I’m not an expert. I went to school for marketing and advertising — definitely not the same topics.
What I have done is tried and failed. A lot. And learned lessons the hard way. I’ve gone against the grain a time or two because of what I’ve experienced and I’m extremely passionate about these topics. Because of that, this is where I chose to focus my time and energy. I see how each of each of them correlate with the others in my life. For example, when I eat bad my mood suffers. I don’t want to work out and then I have less energy. When my mood and energy levels are down, I’m not a good teammate to my husband and ultimately, all of this happens because I didn’t place God first.
Not Facts. Only Experiences.
That’s MY experience. So that’s what I’ve decided to discuss. If try a new workout program, I’ll take you along for the ride and give you a blow-by-blow. There are nutrition programs and diets galore, and I’ve tried many. However, I’ve fallen in love with Whole30, so for now, that is front and center here.
Marriage is so important and I feel strongly about encouraging it. The best way I know how is to be transparent with mine, so you’ll hear all about Team Huenink. And ultimately, you’ll hear about my wild ride with God. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without all the ups and downs. All too often, I get discouraged in church because people don’t always share their struggles. I think it’s important to be open here because no struggles was not my story, and I’m finally ok with that. Each experience shapes who we are and it’s ok to share the reality.
My goal here is to be authentic and genuine. I want you to know me and I hope to know you too. Don’t be shy to reach out through email, comments on the blog or even on instagram! The only way to create this community we crave is to start a dialogue. That means I do want to hear from you! What would you like to hear about? Someone you’d like to hear from? Let me know what you are thinking!
I’m looking forward to my journey with Existing For More and what it does for all of us. I’m excited to interact with you and joining up with you in this crazy life!
6 thoughts on “What Am I Doing?”
Awwwww 🙂 you’re killing it! Thanks for sharing such a nice, honest post about “the fear”, which I also also feel a lot lately!
I’m so excited to see where this goes!
Thank you my friend! Your support means the world!
I love the part about the blog tanking or being an overnight success. It’s so you! I can almost hear your voice reading this post.
So proud of you my friend.
Haha — I’m glad I come through! I love you and appreciate your support like you wouldn’t believe! 🙂
I’m on my second week of my blog having launched and I’m fairly certain I’ve experienced each of your thoughts. I’m also a pretty 100% or zero type person. Moderation is not great for me. (That’s why I don’t eat added sugar anymore and the Whole30 is amazing) But I’m going to continue to follow God’s lead and celebrate every since positive comment and tiny achievement because only God knows where it will lead. Thank you for sharing! And I hope your “What am I doing?” has been answered more and more clearly for you! God Bless!
Thank you so much Melissa! And so excited for you. Sounds like we are a lot alike. And yes, celebrate!! If you are like me, it will not always be clear what you are doing with your blog, but know there is a reason if He brought you to it. That’s what I keep telling myself 🙂